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I just can’t…

*excuse me if I use some choice words that might not be appropriate language

You know what sucks?

Its when you write an amazing article of above 800 words and reread it several times to perfect it and published it and when a few seconds later you realised you didn’t change the title, you change it and it does change but all the content went POOF!

I am so angry and frustrated right now, like SERIOUSLY?!

Today has been such a shitty day—I didn’t get much studying done (just four chapters of chemistry) and thought to get some writing done so that I’ll feel better and I can get back to studying better after that because its 10:30 pm at night and I haven’t done shit and I feel so damn unprepared for my exams in 5 days. And above all that when I feel some sense of accomplishment or happiness and contentment WordPress ERASES ALL MY WRITING and now NOTHING is left and I just lost it!

I really want to cry right now, sob and let out my frustration and let some feelings out but I can’t because my mum is sitting with me in my room which is MY SPACE since I was a kid where I cry and get over things but she’s sitting here and I can’t show any sad emotion because then she will start off about how all this doesn’t matter and how I’m stupidly crying over nothing WELL IT’S NOT NOTHING IF I FEEL LIKE BREAKING DOWN. Then she’ll get on about how I’m really moody and stuff but SORRY MUM I HAVE FEELINGS SOMETIMES.

Argh I don’t know why I’m even getting into this.. Not like I’ll get any studying done now and even though I just wrote it a while back and remember most of what I wrote, it just WON’T BE THE SAME and I’ll not get that satisfaction with it because every time you write something again you change content and I WANT THAT.

I can’t study anymore now and I really am panicking about how unprepared I am and mostly will go into the bathroom to shed some tears because I need to.

Sorry for such a negative post I’m leaving now.

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13 thoughts on “I just can’t…

  1. This just happened to me last week. I’m sorry it happened! I’ve really learned to start saving everything in an external document and press ctrl+s every sentence or so. Just take a deep breath, focus on something else for an hour if you have the time and do something relaxing. I know how frustrating it is and hard it is to take your mind off of, but if you clear your mind a bit maybe most of it will come back to you 🙂 I hope your day/week gets better. Good luck on all of your things!

    Liked by 1 person

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